Your scent makes me weep.

Literally. It hurts how much I miss you.

I walked into your room and opened up your closet. And as crazy as this sounds…I hugged that sweater you used to wear. I couldn’t help the tears. You are such an amazing person. When I called you, and you started to cry…I didn’t know what to say or do. I am a part of you. When you hurt, I hurt. I can’t begin to imagine how you must feel. But please try to be strong. I need you to be. I love you in every way possible. Insha’Allah I will see you soon. Until then, the phone calls and hugging sweaters will have to do.

Your نواسی Nawasi

Long Over Due.

I don’t quite know why I am writing this. I keep thinking about you. I keep thinking about last fall and the loads of fun we shared. It was awesome. I told you things I never told anyone before, and I think it was great. I’ve mentioned talking to you or saying something, but everyone keeps giving me reasons not to. No one is here right now.

I was looking through old pictures. We had so much fun. I was looking for you on Facebook to message you or something, but didn’t find you. So I thought to myself I might as well write to you through my blog. Maybe when you are bored one day, you will google yourself and find this. I hope you do.

I wanted to apologize. I’m not really sure why I feel the need to, but I do. So here it goes. I’m sorry we couldn’t stay friends. I’m sorry you hurt me. I’m sorry I couldn’t look past it and forgive you when it happened. I am sorry I stopped talking to you. I am sorry I didn’t want to see or talk to you on campus. I’m sorry things happened the way they did. You apologized a long time ago. So it was my turn.

I think you are a very beautiful and intelligent person. I know you are fun and loving and kind. You want to learn things and grow and experience the wonders of life. Your mother is amazing and a very hard worker. You sisters are sweet and nice to be around. Simple things make them happy, and that is rare to find.

We all have flaws. We all make mistakes. We all do things that we regret. We are human. Undermining someone is not nice. Making them feel bad isn’t either. It just hurt, because you were one of my closest friends and I just couldn’t believe it. I am this naive girl, who has faith in anything that moves. I have set such high expectations for people and myself. I had been a doormat for years and it wasn’t the right thing for me. I want you to know how much I do care about you and want the best for you.

I want you to look for happiness and contentment in your life. I want you to be adventurous but careful. Humble yet confident. I want you to be YOURSELF every moment of each day. You deserve a lot more than you think. Don’t settle for less and don’t let anyone treat you like you don’t matter. Don’t cry alone. Don’t go out of your way for people who are worthless. You are a very sweet and pretty girl. Know that. Own that.

Take Care of Yourself. Always Keep Smiling.

Beautiful Voice