some thoughts

When I was younger and adults used to ask what I wanted to be when I grew up, I always answered, “It doesn’t matter as long as I am helping someone.” They would tell me there were countless career options for me then. Shortly after I started college at UNCG I decided I wanted to be a teacher. I wanted to help give kids the confidence they need to be successful in school. I wanted to be those inspiring and wonderful teachers I had growing up, and who I would never forget.

While I was in Greensboro, I needed to get a job to help pay for housing and bills. A friend told me to apply to an agency that specialized in helping people with Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities to reach their goals. Three months working with a five year old with autism, I was sold. This is what I was passionate about. I wanted to work every day and help this kindergartner with his goals. I wanted to practice his signs for “puzzle” and “bubble” and “candy”. It would truly be the highlight of my week. When I had to leave Greensboro due to my health, it was very hard. I kept telling myself it was temporary and I was going back but the doctor had told me I couldn’t work with the kids for now. I couldn’t lift, or jump, or run. I couldn’t do what I had fallen in love with, and that was the hardest thing to face.

My goal was to finish college and so this was my first step. I loved being in the classroom and if I had to live in Durham, why not take classes and focus on my goal. So I wasn’t going to waste this summer. I wanted to be as prepared as possible. We don’t know what tomorrow will bring so if we must move with the wind, we must be prepared somehow. Every class I take and semester that goes by, I know I am closer to my goal to help people. I still want to be a teacher; I still crave the smile on the face of a child and the way their eyes light up when they have truly learned something new. I plan to work very hard and complete my special education degree. I want to continue to reach my goals, despite what any doctors will tell me. I will work again with kids who need extra time and help. I will teach them everything I can and I will succeed because nothing will stop my drive, nothing will curve that craving and I hope nothing ever does.

My Parent’s 30th Anniversary Video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7kFZZbJ7w8&feature=plcp

share a piece of you.

In my opinion, one of the biggest regrets a person can have in their life is to not take advantage of the opportunities that present themselves. I feel as though each of us have our own lottery in life. Each of us has our own path and we all have different wonderful opportunities given to us by God.
When something is given to you, accept it with integrity and honor and patience and poise. Accept it because maybe it’s what is best for you. Everything happens for a reason, and you should embrace your fate. InshaAllah it’ll take you to unimaginably positive places!!
God is constantly testing us and He wants us to succeed. He wants us to take what is being given to us and use it to our advantage. He wants us to grown and learn and teach.
A way we can start is by learning from each other. I think we can benefit from one another. I think there are so many people that cross our paths whom we can talk to and get to know and befriend. 🙂 There is a beauty to each individual. There is a light that shines from within that we can recognize. That we can trust.
I looooove making friends. I pretty much will begin a conversation with anyone. Sitting in the student union, at the library, I get to meet people all day and I get to be a part of their day.  I am someone who is constantly smiling. (It’s Sunnah) I think that smiling goes a very long way. You can brighten someone’s day with a smile and a simple conversation. Even if it’s about the weather.
I think people are amazing. I think we are created with such depth; we are created with so much substance. We truly are blessed, mashaAllah. I think that everyone has something to share, everyone has something they can show us that we may have never seen or heard of before. There are about seven billion people who live on this planet with us. Who breathe the same air; feel the same wind and rain, who admire the same moonlight. Our life lights up with beautiful sunshine and becomes gray with the same clouds in the sky.
I think it’s a blessing to meet someone new. To learn about their life…their happiness and their troubles. Their fears and successes. I think we can learn so much about ourselves by just getting to know others. By opening our eyes to their life we can find some understanding within our own.
Just a thought or two.

So how about we start here. Share something with us, anything. Whether it’s positive, negative, a secret, a funny joke, a story, a favorite flavor of ice cream, a fear, a goal, a dream, a wish, a truth, a desire and so one.

I’ll start.

I don’t know what my future has in store for me. I don’t know where I’ll be a few years from now. But I do know that my purpose here is to help. I want to be able to do something for people. I want to be able to give myself to them. To people who need physical help, emotional help, mental help, financial help, domestic help, spiritual help….you name it…I want to do it. I want to be a part of something big, even if I do something so small. I want to learn and teach. I want to be a teacher. I want to be a mediator, I want to be a role model to my sister. I want to be someone one is always honest and kind and humble. I want to do lots of things and I don’t want anyone to try and stop me. I want to dream about change. About peace. About hope. I want to give hope to those who have lost it. I want to hug those who need it most. I want to hold those who are left with nothing and tell them that God is on their side. Tell them that He has a plan for them and that truly truly truly I believe that after hardship, there is ease. I have faith my dreams will come true, Insha’Allah. May Allah help me through my journey.

Bobos.

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Dear Bobos,

    Thinking of all four of you. Sending my love and countless du’aas your way.

Love, Sanya Khala

Distance is always tough between the people you love, especially when they are adorable, blooming babies.

The First Steps are Honesty and Acknowledgement.

Did you used to imagine yourself as an adult when you were younger? The way you’d look, what you’d be doing with your life, who the people in your life would be and most importantly what would your priorities be. I’ve been thinking about ME lately. What I need to do in order to become a better me. I really don’t know where to begin. I’ve started being extremely honest with myself, and I hope it helps.

Truth is…there is a lot of stuff about myself I would like to change. I want to be a better Muslim, a better person, a better sister and daughter and friend. I want to be a better granddaughter to the only grandparent I have left. I want to be a better student, a better teacher, a better listener, a better thinker, a better writer, a better reader, a better dreamer, a better believer. I want to make things happen. I want to help the world. It starts with a single step, and I have decided to step forward.

I want to incorporate things into my every day routine that will help me with all of this. I feel pretty lost, and before it’s too late…I want to find myself.

Why are we here? What’s the purpose? What happens afterwards? What will we be accountable for? We have been taught these things from an early age. But do we ever go back an actually live accordingly? Do we even think about it afterwards? And if we do, then why can’t we do everything in our power to make sure we make the right decisions for our lives. I ask myself this everyday…and most of the time I don’t even have an answer for it.

May Allah help guide us towards the right path, may He make it easier for us to live in the duniya and may He grant us Jannat insha’Allah. May we have patience and understand our trials and tribulations. May we all strive to become better. You are all in my duas.

a comeback.

Why did I stop blogging? I just finished watching Julie and Julie with my sister, and I remembered why I started in the first place. I wanted to WRITE. I wanted to express myself, learn new things and share my silly thoughts with…EVERYBODY! It doesn’t even matter to me if no one in the world reads my blog. As long as I write, as long as I do it because I love it, it’s worth it. 🙂

I’m so extremely happy, Alhumdulilah. So much has happened I don’t even know where to begin. I’m becoming a Khala again. It’s really wonderful. I have my beautiful nephew following me around everywhere I go. I’m in Canada for about a month and a half. I have been spending time with my brilliant cousins , caring mamoo and mami and loving nani. I love hanging out with my sister as well. Her due date is coming closer and closer. We are all very excited to say the least. My chotu wakes me up every morning with a, ‘Khala uthh gayee?’ Except he can’t pronounce Khala correctly and says Saala instead. Kids. 🙂 He’s spunky and sharp. Masha’Allah  a bright boy with extraordinary parents. He’s Lucky.

Toronto is nice. I’d like to think I’m prepared for the winter ahead. The gray and purple skies is what I go to sleep to. The view from my bedroom is spectacular. I’ll post a picture soon. [edit: 4/18/12] I can see the CN Tower from here and all that surrounds it. I can see the whole city. It’s pretty amazing. We are on the ninth floor. I’m not used to any of this back in Carolina. It’s a nice change of pace.

I was checking out Slice of Lemon http://sliceoflemon.com/ today and Sabrina has a GREAT idea. 21 days to be better. I’m going to make a list for myself. Insha’Allah this will be wonderful! I seriously cannot wait. Thanks Sabrina 🙂

a complex question.

We ask questions everyday. Ask ourselves, our friends, our teachers, our parents and our God. Sometimes we find the answers we’re looking for, with time some questions answer themselves and then there are always those few questions that remain unanswered, for various reasons.

Goodness, they bug me. I consider myself an extremely curious person. Someone with a never-ending list of questions. They pop up and out of nowhere, and the worst part is….I LOVE ASKING QUESTIONS. So I don’t even try to stop myself.

I hope you all don’t mind when I do so. I’m energetic. I’m silly. I’m smiley and sometimes scared. But living in fear of worldly things is not living at all. I say….Ask All The Questions You Want. Whether they be simple or obvious or silly or complex. If you feel as though you can learn something, then go for it. A person should try to learn each and everyday. Things that will benefit us now and in the future, insha’Allah.

Like I said before, some questions don’t have answers…or maybe we aren’t ready to know. God knows what is best for us. Be curious, but cautious and careful. And never stop questioning!! Well, not until you find what you are looking for. =]

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